Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Malthus Paragraph
While a large population gives factories for more employees, it causes the food supply to run low, therefore causing positive and preventative checks to be necessary in order to prevent the poor from over populating and blaming the government. The positive check is when a natural disaster occurs, killing a large amount of people. Malthus views this as a positive event, because he believes these disasters are natures' way of restoring the food to people ratio to be back in order. Since Malthus believes in this idea, he doesn't come off as a very compassionate or sympathetic guy. He blames the poor for the lack of food and overpopulation. This is because despite the poor not having a lot of food, they continue to reproduce. If one can't provide enough food for themselves, they shouldn't have more kids, because then they would have to feed more mouths! Instead of the poor taking credit for their part in the famines, they blame the government. Malthus disagrees with the poor on that matter. He may have not been in the lower class, but he was well aware of their dilemmas, and saw the solution. It was a single solution that would solve the whole nation's problem! If there isn't enough food for the amount of people in a nation, then they should stop reproducing and let the food growth rate catch up to the human growth rate!
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The paragraph is good overall. I would suggest to maybe say a little bit less about Malthus and his background and focus a little bit more on his argument.
ReplyDeleteHi Julia
ReplyDeleteI like that your paragraph is straightforward and easy to understand. Also, I like your use of transition words. I think you might not want to use as many exclamation points because it sometimes makes the paragraph seem less formal but overall I really enjoyed reading your paragraph.
-Amy
I would change the wording of this "He may have not been..." to "He might not have been..." Overall I really like it, I think you prove your topic sentence throughout the paragraph.
ReplyDeletestrong paragraph overall, but maybe add in some quotes and context to strengthen your arugment. Also focus to the arguments instead of Malthus's background, but solid all around.
ReplyDeleteits a good paragraph but i would try to avoid talking about what Malthus seems like as a person.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you need to put "Malthus views this as a positive event, because he believes these disasters are natures' way of restoring the food to people ratio to be back in order." or you could re word it.
ReplyDelete