Friday, September 14, 2012
Will Luzaitis- Malthus Paragraph
Although an increased population will produce more workers, when the population increases to rapidly there will be a shortage of resources leaving more people in poverty to do there reckless reproduction. Malthus feels that all people do is eat, sleep, and reproduce. Humans need food and also need to reproduce, but when they reproduced to much, we out grow our food supply. To prevent this from happening, he believed that there were two diffrent kinds of checks on population. First there is preventive checks, which was when man thought about how many kids he could have depending on how much money he made. Then there was positive checks which were diseases, floods, working conditions, etc. This helped kill off the population. Malthus blamed the poor for over population because they had to many kids for what they could afford and when they did positive checks would come into play.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Great evidence on checks but you never show the shortage of food and how it is connected to these checks.
ReplyDeleteGood evidence Will just make sure your using the right to. In most of the cases it should have been too. Well written though except for some grammatical errors
ReplyDeleteI really like your paragraph Will. I liked how you used Malthus's checks as the evidence for your paragraph. I have a suggestion for one of your sentences: "Humans need food and also need to reproduce, but when they reproduced to much, we out grow our food supply." say "they" not "we" before "out grow our food supply". Great work!
ReplyDeleteDear Will,
ReplyDeleteGreat job on the paragraph! Remember that this is in the past meaning that all verbs are in the past tense. There are a few spelling and grammar errors, however you do a great job of describing how the population is outgrowing the food supply. Overall keep up the good work and I really enjoyed reading this paragraph.
-Michael
Good job Will! Go more in depth about Malthus's view towards the poor/why he does not like them. Be sure to include their dynamic with the higher classes.
ReplyDeleteA few miscellaneous spelling and grammar areas such as "to" instead of "too" and "there" instead of "their." "Out grow" can be made into "outgrow (one word not two). Also try to avoid the first person; there is at least one time you use it. To improve on the actual writing of the paragraph, I would recommend that you go into more than directly what he says about checks, and say what he thinks might happen, and what the consequences of the poor's reproduction is. Other than that your paragraph is very good.
ReplyDelete