Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Giuliana P. Malthus Paragraph

  Malthus believed that the growing population of the world would one day exceed the natural and man-made resources needed to maintain life.  Worried about this issue, Malthus created a list that stated strong assumptions a society should follow.  Malthus also understood the idea that the population should be checked, and that an unchecked society would grow a population to big to handle.  He also agreed with the idea that the supply and abundance of food should be kept equal, because of the high population and with food a necessary part of life, everything should be equal.  Malthus also uses the population to check death rate in the society, helping keep track of the population as it either is decreasing or increasing.  Lastly, Malthus considers that the population mixed with poverty leads to difference in workers wages, parishes, and rich verses poor in the society.  There is no up side to a decrease in population or increase, with a higher population comes more workers for factories, but a shorter supply of food for the workers and their families.  These checks help by preventing the lower class from over populating and having the population criticize the government. 

5 comments:

  1. I think if you add an example of a positive check it will make your paragraph stronger and it will add specific detail from the text.

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  2. This is more statements rather than arguements but you're still the coolest kid I know

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  3. Hey Giuliana, One minor thing is maybe you can add a closing sentence! But overall you did a great job.. Keep up the great work.

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  4. Hi Giuliana, you worked really well with you thesis/topic sentence. One thing I would tell you to work on is embedding evidence (Direct quotes) to back-up your argument/statements. But good job, Blowfish would be proud.

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  5. Hi-I think you have some excellent factual evidence, you just need to add and opinion, judgemental, or arguement into your paragraph. i like the "There is no up side to a decrease in population or increase, with a higher population comes more workers for factories, but a shorter supply of food for the workers and their families." maybe you could add "thus being said, Malthus cruelly believes that the positive checks, deaths by natural disasters are necessary to help equal out the balance between population and food supply."
    Overal, really well written and a ton of good evidence!
    Hope this helped:)
    -Diana

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